10:00 am Friday 17th April 2026

Guestbook is currently down

There is currently an issue with the guestbook at the moment. If you go there and try to make a comment, it will just say “guestbook is loading” and it won't actually load. I have done some testing, and it seems to be server-side, and nothing to do with my code or anything like that. I also checked to see if it was my ISP, but using a VPN showed the same results of the guestbook refusing to load.

I'm unfortunately unable to log-in to the website that hosts the comments in the first place because the same server error that's causing the guestbooks to not load is the same error that makes it impossible for me to log in. Meaning all I have of the record of comments is the emails I was getting, notifying me of the comments. I kept all these emails so I have everyone's comments, thankfully. But I only have a few emails of the responses I gave back. At some point I started responding to every comment I received, and I didn't keep the emails of my responses since...well I didn't care as much about my own responses and was trying to delete emails I didn't need or care about since I wanted to save space in my inbox (I'm slowly running out of space). I managed to save a few from the trash, but the other responses I gave are just gone from my emails.

I have emailed Bawkbox (the provider of the comment box I use) to let them know of the issue and hopefully they see it and are able to fix the issue. The last comment I received on my guestbook was April 1st (Sydney time), so between then and now something must have broken. I do not know exactly how long it has been down for. It could have only been a few days, it could've been since April 1st shortly after I responded to that last comment (I responded on the same day). I'm not sure. I'll give it two weeks, and if nothing changes or I don't get a response back from Bawkbox, I will have to start working on my own, in-house comment section that is not third party but fully managed by me. I believe that sort of thing is only really possible with a subscription to neocities...but at this point it would be worth it, I think. I saw some code a while back that seemed pretty easy to figure out, and if it comes to it, I'll just use that code I saw. I'm just somewhat done with relying upon 3rd party tools that eventually shut down or break.

To those that wish to make comments, at this point and time you will have to comment on the actual Neocities profile, like what a few others have done in the past. This unfortunately means you must be a Neocities user and have your own website. I apologise deeply to those that do not have a Neocities account but do wish to make comments. The maximum amount of time that I should be without a guestbook that works will be a month (hopefully). I don't know how long it will take to get the code I need to work if I need to pivot to my own self-managed guestbook. But I will of course give updates to how long I think it will take if that does come to pass.

If at all I do need to pivot to my own tool, I will accumulate every comment from every place I've ever gotten a comment from (neocities profile comments, 123guestbook, htmlcommentbox) and put them in there, alongside new comments people decide to make.

9:09 am Tuesday 16th April 2026

300k views already???

In only 6 months, the views for my website jumped up from 200k all the way to 300k. Kind of nuts!!! Previously I'd been getting 100k views a year, but now the time has halved down to 6 months. My website is...actually popular, and getting followers (without me needing to spam follow other people like what others seem to do lmao). I'm just kind of shocked that my silly little website is something people are interested in looking at. But also at the same time I'm like “duh of course people want to look at my website and interact with it, I put all this effort into making it look good and fixing the bugs and making it mobile friendly and adding lots of stuff to it” like idk I guess I just thought my website would only be something my friends looked at and such. I'm really proud of myself though! Yipppeeee!!!!

On the topic of my website, I think I might make a site-map to make things easier for people who do NOT know where the fuck anything is. I have a lot of pages on my website and while I'm certain lots of people like the feeling of exploring it and seeing all the things that are there by just...clicking on all the buttons, I feel like having a sitemap will help to make the place more accessible to people who just want a list of all the links/pages available rather than trying to faff about and figure out on their own where everything is. I mean, I feel like I make it pretty obvious where certain stuff is based on the images in the icons and the way that I name them (which, btw, I feel like I struck gold with each section being given an alliterative name). But I feel like having an additional layer of accessibility can only be a good thing.

I’ll start working on the sitemap after I have my shower, lol. It really shouldn’t take too long.

To change the subject a little (to things that are still positive), I feel like I've noticed myself laughing a lot more since I got Jerry, and the laughs I do are deeper sounding, but also more free and joyful. Jerry does a lot of silly things, and sometimes he does silly things in the effort to get my attention, affection and love. He'll get right up in my face while I'm laying in bed and meow loudly at me, as if to say “HEY. PET ME.” Sometimes he gets so close it's weird and he tries to sit right near face while sniffing me, and it just makes me laugh. Even him just rolling around in dirt makes me so happy (because I can see he's enjoying himself) and that happiness just turns into laughter. I'm feeling much happier with Jerry around. I almost can't imagine a life without him, now. I can't imagine all of that time spent by myself and not going outside and not reading books in the sun. I was definitely sadder before than I am now. As a friend of mine recently told me in an email, having an animal around can be so healing, and that is so true. I can see the effects of Jerry's existence on my mind and behaviour, and it's a positive thing. I'm not perfect, obviously lol. I'm still a shut-in with no irl friends and no job, but it's not something that saddens me much anymore. To me it just...is what it is. I'm more content, I think. I feel more relaxed in my life. I go to sleep without anything but blankets on my bed and wake up with jerry whining and groaning because I accidentally bumped into him (because he was curled up next to me). I feel less afraid of being in the dark because even though Jerry isn't like...a guard dog, or anything, just his presence makes me feel less scared. Getting a cat was such a good thing for my mental wellbeing and I'm glad I convinced my mum to let me keep him. Besides, she seems to have warmed up to him as well. Even if he is sometimes a little shit lmfao.

9:50 am Sunday 12th April 2026

Feeling more like a normal person.

I had a lapse of judgement today and chose to quickly check tumblr.

It was only going to be for a few minutes- if only to see if any porn-bots had followed me so I could block them. There was one. I blocked it. I was going to go about my day but then I was like "hey I should check a mutual's blog and see what they've been up to" and boy it was a big mistake. Lots of reblogged posts that were pessimisstic as hell and I'm just like. Wow, I just poisoned my brain with pessimism that wasn't previously there just by looking at a few awful posts. I realise how much of an echo chamber that website really is, not just for whiteness but also for pessimism and doomerism. I took one look at tumblr for a few minutes and could feel my heartrate spike and my anger increase, in enough increments for it to be noticable.

I learned my lesson I suppose. Some parts of me still want to share things on that website, like my art or my thoughts or whatever. But nope. No. I don't like that place. I don't know what the hell I ever saw in that website. It is nothing in comparison to what I'm capable of on my own website, and my own website is also not a source of stress for me. I must have been in some sort of comotose state the entire time being on tumblr- or some sort of weird stockholme syndrom type of situation (I know stockholme syndrom isn't real and was based on people's poor understanding of the normal reactions of a woman that was terrified out of her mind and unable to trust the police nor the person who had held her hostage because both were not helping her get out of her hostage situation, but I don't know any other words to describe the feeling of being locked up in an echo chamber that hurts you, and then you being trained to like it). Because I believe it's been about 2 and a half weeks (I thought it was longer than that, like a month or something) and I feel myself truly relaxing and not worrying about anything and feeling truly like a more...normal person.

And this of course coincides with me acquiring a cat and having a normal routine of waking up at 7am (it's usually 6 lmao) and then going to bed at 11pm and figuring out how to fit all the things I want to do in-between taking the cat out (which I do during sunrise and sunset) since we usually spend an hour or so outside. I usually read a book during these times, in-between chasing Jerry around whenever he chases after another cat (which is frequently). It just feels like a normal person thing to do, rather than going on my phone and arguing with ignorant and angry racists on the other side of the world about shit they don't even know about. If I gotta argue with a racist it's gonna be in real life, and instead of arguing I think I'll just hit them on the head instead and get to the actual point of the whole interaction- they don't like me for being Aboriginal, might as well give them a real reason to not like me. I just got no time for it anymore. Racists get their face done in. Even if I'm a lot more mellow nowadays and feel actually quite a bit shy about violence now, sometimes you gotta hit a wanker to let him know he's a wanker.

As for the whole chasing the cat around the yard scenarios I seem to get myself in, Jerry always snorts and huffs and breathes heavily and shakes when he sees another cat- and I have wonder if it's fear, anger or excitement that he's feeling. I can't tell, but I think it might be fear, because when I try to touch him or talk to him in that state, he does that rowrowrow angry cat noise and hisses at me. I have to wait for him to calm down before I can pick him up and take him inside so he can calm down in there. I feel kinda bad about him getting into that state- it clearly stresses him out, but there's not much I can personally do about the other cats- they won't go away.

Even though Jerry's previous owner M has fully moved out (I even helped her clean the bathrooms before she left), she still has some cat food in a box, and she comes back every afternoon and night to feed the stray cats. It's quite annoying. And definitely not allowed, since she doesn't live there anymore. I get that the cats are like strays and not being taken care of, but this house is Jerry's territory and he defends it like hell and gets stressed whenever he sees another cat. M doesn't care about that, though. I'm glad Jerry's my cat now and not hers. The stray cats are being taken away soon by a cat catcher. My mum called the council and they arranged it to be done on Monday- which is tomorrow. No more cat problems, no more stressed Jerry, and hopefully those cats will find proper homes. If not, they'll probably be euthanised. Harsh, but that's just reality. I do hope the little calico will find a home though. He's sweet and loving and afraid of nothing. I think he'll find a home fast.

11:37 am Friday 3rd April 2026

getting really into WoW roleplay!

i keep wanting to make this blog post and keep forgetting to write it down lol so i may as well write it now when i got the time.

i mostly just wanna talk about my rp's i've been doing in WoW. i've been doing a lot of rp with my friends, both my buddy L and my other friends too. Mostly on my warlock dracthyr, Cynder Slatehorn.

I kinda stumbled into rp with her last year when I went to an rp event a year ago with my friends on their actual rp characters, specifically the tirisfal theatre troupe putting on a play. Cynder was the only WrA original character I had that didn't have a wacky fucking name like Traumatised or Dinnerplate, or wasn't a doppelgänger of an existing WoW character that also had a fucked up named (Sylvanussy, Meowthias, Greymain, Throllzbollz, Flynfartwind, etc.) so I figured, eh, I'll just choose Cynder I suppose.

(Funnily enough, when I made Cynder she looked quite a bit different and was supposed to be a doppelgänger of Cynder from The Legend of Spyro video game series. But then I chose some awesome clothes for her and it didn't match her draconic form at all, so I changed her colours and her horns and a decent amount about her until...she just became her own character.)

After that play was done, all my friends started rping and...I just went along with it, making shit up as I went. It was an awesome experience. I then realised WoW rp was awesome and I had to continue doing it, so I downloaded trp and made Cynder a proper profile and everything. I did a rp with a random blood elf lady who saw my profile when I was walking by and thought it was cool, and it was a nice, simple little rp that helped me to dip my toes in. I didn't rp for a while after that cuz. well. life and shit. but i was itching for more

But more recently a good friend of mine asked if i rp'd, cuz they'd checked out my WoW house and said i had “the rper's spirit” because of how well it was made, and i said i had rp'd before a little bit and would like to do more. i then rp'd multiple times with them and some of their friends, on two diff characters (grokkar and cynder, but mostly cynder) and it fully solidified within me how fun it is to roleplay on WoW. I then convinced my buddy L to rp with me yesterday with both our warlocks, and that was also really fun hehe :3 And hopefully in the future my buddy L, my other friends and I can all rp together and have a blast and be silly.

anyways i should make a page for cynder on this website at some point. since she's kinda become my main and i've been rping on her a lot, and one of the WoW houses I own is literally canonically her house (i should probably put some type of pics or vids of those houses on this website but that's for another day lol).

1:00 pm Tuesday 24th March 2026

🎉 Finally left tumblr! 🎉

so this morning was a little eh, but once i got up and got to doing stuff i needed to do, i felt a little bit better and more like i could handle today's stuff..

today is the day i’ve left tumblr. like proper left. logged out of the website on all my devices and deleted the app from my phone. as i write this i just remembered that i had a little series of posts of me ranking each WoW zone by how Australian they looked, and I think I gotta put that stuff on my website cuz I wanna continue that until every zone in WoW is fully ranked lol.

to celebrate me leaving tumblr, i went to the library to borrow some books. i hadn't been there in a while so i was just a tad surprised that it had changed appearance a little (not by much tho). i went in looking for 1 book (dark emu by brice pascoe) and left the library with 3 😂 thankfully including the one that i'd gone in there for. i found the book “sand talk” by tyson yunkaporta which i'd been wanting to read for a while so i grabbed that one as well. as well as a book about someone's personal experiences in gaza, specifically a newer book from like just a few years ago (both surprised my small town library has newer books at all- but unsurprised that it has newer books about palestine given it’s a very current and important topic).

i may end up writing in this blog about what my thoughts are of these books and such. i want to get back into reading so i figure- borrow some books and read everyday! read as much as i can :3

i also got some fish and chips when i went out, and ohhh yeah baby those were fucking good. i had chicken salt on them plus lemon juice 🍋 it was tasty af. all in all, i had a good morning/afternoon.

uhhh to very abruptly change the subject, i rp’d with a good friend on WoW recently and it got me into the rp mindset. i wanna rp on WoW more. they said that they hadn’t rp’d in such a long ass fucking time (for literally years or something) and that the rp we had together (with my dude Grokkar and their small orcish lady warrior) was the funniest they’d had in a while, and that i was genuinely good at rping. basically my dude Grokkar was picking flowers (he’s a herbalist and alchemist) and their orc Kruga was just fucking with him the entire time. it was mad funny. i hope to rp more 💜

7:18 pm Sunday 22nd March 2026

future ideas for the website

sooo in a few days i leave tumblr for good, and i was thinking of adding some sort of RSS feed to my website so that people can get updates to my blog or website. of course, it would mean that the followers of my website would need an RSS reader so they could keep up to date, but in the end that's not so bad because it means they don't need to give me or some other third party their email since RSS doesn't use emails to update people of website updates :3 I've never used RSS before and i only got a basic gist of how it works, but i think i can probably figure it out with enough finagling lol.

i'm also in the process of putting up all of my in-character elite: dangerous entries onto the website but that's taking a little bit of time. it'll take far more time than the spore stuff did, which took only 2 days. but that was cuz i had not that many creations i made myself on my spore-related tumblr side-blog. i have well over 70 entries/posts on my elite: dangerous side blog, alongside images and shit...so that will take some time to code. like. probably a lot. lol. but it'll get done eventually. that also means i'll probably need RSS feeds for various different pages...or maybe idk. just my whole website? i'm not sure. IF YOU, THE READER, ARE READING THIS, I WOULD LIKE FEEDBACK! do you want an RSS feed for individual parts of my website, like my blog, my spore creations, my art, etc...or just the whole website? go to my guestbook and tell me what u think!

also i hope to one day make my website mobile friendly like properly 💔 because i did that for my professional portfolio website, so i know how to do it. but this website so big...it might take a long ass time. a horrible awful hassle for future me blegh

5:15 pm Saturday 21st March 2026

Jerry, WoW, and adding more shit to my website

jerry is doing better in terms of settling in!!! he is no longer waking my ass up at 6 am. now he wakes me up at 7 or 8! he's sleeping on my bed and night and being less of a littel rascal. he has a sensitive tummy and doesn't like any food that isn't his normal food or he throws up gets diarrhea (my poor baby, i totally understand that feeling).

i been playing the new WoW expansion called midnight. i got thru eversong woods and also harandar, i just gotta see the other places now. i'm going a bit slow, everyone else i know has seen way more of the expansion than me lol. i'm over here like lalalala *picks flowers* while everyone talks about spoilers and shit and i just have to plug my ears or look away so i dont spoil myself (oops it already happened! well darn). I did unlock the Haranir race and those fellas are super cool :3

if you didn't see the little thing i wrote a few days ago, i'm moving all my sideblog from tumblr to my website, and i'm no longer gonna be on tumblr. it kinda saddens me to leave the website since i've been on there for 14 years, but the place is such a massive white american echo chamber that...i don't wanna stay there anymore. the racism i keep experiencing + the horrible shit ppl say to me even when they agree with some of my points is just. like. idk. i'm not alive on this earth so people can be racist to me and ignore everything i'm saying and question my Aboriginality or try to absolve themselves of their racism by making it my problem to solve etc. etc.

I'm not here on this earth to do all that. i'm here to pet kitty cats and make art and have fun with coding my website and play video games and sniff flowers!!!!! preferably without white people up in my shit causing me problems. sooo it's time i moved on. this year is a year of change- where things are different now. already, i've made things different: i got a steam deck which revolutionised my gaming experience and made gaming easier and more fun since now i can play newer and older games everyone been harping on about that my computer could NEVER play. i got a new cat, jerry, which made it so that i had to have a proper schedule and be responsible for him. i have more money now, because of centrelink payments that i wasn't getting before. and now, i leave a website i've been on for...a huge portion of my life. it's time for me to let go of the old and focus on something new and different (even tho my website isn't new and i've had it for a few years now lmao).

1:28 pm Wednesday 25th February 2026

how it's been with jerry boy

sooo i've had jerry in my house for about 2 weeks now, and...well, let's just say each day has brought something new with it. Jerry is still trying to settle in, but I feel like he's doing a better job at settling in now than he was before. He's being a lot more affectionate with me, coming up onto my bed and cuddling with me and laying on me.

my new routine is a little harsh on my body because Jerry wants to be fed at THEE arse crack of dawn. 6 am, sometimes 7 am if he's being generous with me. my routine before was go to bed at like 1 or 2 am and then wake up at 9-10 am. but that's just not feasible anymore because jerry needs to be fed earlier. then he wants to go outside immediately after being fed. I give him supervised outdoor time for a while, and when he starts trying to wonder off the property, I lead him back with some treats (rabbit and beef flavoured kibble). If he is really adament about wondering off, i'll distract him with a bunch of treats and then pick him up, and bring him back to the front yard. or if we've been outside for long enough, i'll bring him back inside. (if i try to pick him up without distracting him with treats, he complains by meowing angrily or by biting me. the treats work wonders).

recently he got a bit sick because of the diet change and the stress of acclimating into a new home, so i had to take him to the vet. he had constipation, and then suddenly switched to diarrhea overnight, which was obvs concerning. i'm currently giving him pain meds and antibiotics, and he's being a very brave boy for eating his food with the meds even though the antibiotics smell weird. like, me with my shitty bad nose that sucks can smell the antibiotics, and even when i mix it in super well with his food, the super smelly meaty food basically is overpowered by the smell of the antibiotics. and if *i* can smell it, jerry with his way more powerful cat nose can ABSOLUTELY tell there's something up with his food. he refuses it at first, but i've been able to encourage him to eat it and i've been praising him and petting him the whole time. he is a very very very brave and good boy for eating it despite it probably tasting really fucking yucky.

on march 7th both the cat backpack and the cat harness that i bought for him online will show up in the mail. i'm fucking STOKED for it. i've not been this excited for something to come in the mail since i was waiting around for my steam deck (which i've been having a blast with btw). jerry really needs to be walked- at the arse crack of dawn and right before the sun sets. he's kind of restless without it. me giving him supervised outdoor time *is* good for him but i can tell it's just not enough for him. the property isn't particularly large so there's really not much he can explore, and i know that it upsets him greatly. so i'm gonna get him acclimated to the cat backpack and the harness, then eventually take him for walks. i'm pretty excited about it.